As I’m sure many of you know, I participated in the Disney College Program for Spring 2016. I was down in Orlando for about 8 months, arriving January 11th and departing August 4th. My original role, the one I was hired for, was concierge at a moderate resort called Port Orleans (both sides).
About 5 months into my program I was told that I was being moved, “Deployment” as they called it, to the parks. I started working at Typhoon Lagoon, a water park, as a Quick Service cast member. For those that know me, I was not happy. At all. Everyday people would ask how I liked my new location and I wouldn’t hesitate to notify them that I hated it and then I proceed to tell them all the reason why I hated it: I got paid less, I less days off and similar hours count, the guests treated me differently, I couldn’t make the same magical moments as before, my Leaders were not as approachable, the list went on and on in my mind.
Needless to say, the last 3 months of my program were particularly rough. I was no longer on the same schedule as my friends so making plans was really difficult, I got out of work a lot earlier which meant I went into work a lot earlier, meaning I had to plan my nights and mornings accordingly.
After that long backstory, I’m going to finally explain why I actually made this post hahaha
I’ve been back home about a week, and I’ve noticed a pattern within myself: slight depression. I say slight because it’s impairing me in any way. I’m able to function properly, I get up, I eat, I look for a job, fix things for school etc. The only thing is when I leave the house I get uncontrollably sad, I start crying in my car, on the drive to wherever it is I’m going and sometimes I just turn around and go back to my parents house. I cancel a lot on my friends and I avoid talking to anyone about my time in Disney.
And honestly, that’s okay.
If you ever feel this way about anything, don’t let anyone tell you it’s not okay. It’s an emotion that you are feeling and because of that you are 100% allowed to feel it for however long you need.
Something I tell myself and my friends is: “Feel down until you feel up again.” Sometimes you need more time than other people, everyone is different so don’t hold yourself to the same standards as others hold themselves to.
Here’s a list I compiled on my thoughts Post-Disney:
- Home isn’t “home” anymore
- I wake up confused sometimes because my room here is bright and my room in Orlando was not
- I don’t really want to leave the house at all for anything
- I don’t have discounts on anything anymore, which is sad
- Sometimes it feels like I was never there and it never happened
- People constantly ask me questions but I just don’t want to talk about it
- “we don’t talk about it” is a regular part of my vocabulary now.
- I definitely had more “midlife crisis” than a 21 should be having in this last week
- I threw everything “Pre-Disney” away when I got back
- I don’t want to go to bars or clubs here cause they won’t be the same at all
- Everything seem to be “boring” here
- I get offended when someone says something negative about Disney/Orlando
- I’m still trying to find the hidden Mickey’s
- The lack of safety around here is astonishing, “Safe-D beings with me!”
- I’m upset by the lack of “Magical Moments”
- I’m also upset that I can’t go to Epcot anymore
- Also, sad about no more French ice cream and Italian pizza
- I don’t live in Vista Way anymore, weird
- I wish I could still walk to Walgreens
- My Mondays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays are extra boring now
- Cast Connections 😦
- I’ll never paint a Duffy again
- I will forever mourn the C bus
I hope this list of grievances helps you understand where I’m coming from haha